Letting go of self, cultivate with righteousness

Greetings Master, greetings fellow practitioners.

I started my cultivation in 2007 and joined the European Tian Guo Marching Band in 2009. Below are some of my experiences.

From childhood, I've held an interest in music and the performance, yet my circumstances never afforded opportunities to pursue them. During my youth, I joined the school brass band, learning the Euphonium. Due to my family's limited means at the time, I didn't own an instrument and could only practice during the twice-weekly extracurricular sessions at school. In my final year, the school organized a trip for the brass band to perform at a music festival in Northern Europe. I was thrilled. However, the cost of travelling to Europe was very expensive. My father, in a difficult position, asked if I could skip the trip. But I was utterly determined not to miss this rare opportunity. After much persuasion, he reluctantly agreed. Yet, just days later, the headmaster suddenly announced that all graduating classes must cease extracurricular activities immediately. I could no longer participate in the brass band. I was devastated, because after graduation, I would never have another chance to join such a brass band, and performing in Europe seemed utterly impossible. Little did I know then that Master had already arranged something far better for me.

Years later, I came to France and began cultivating Dafa. I joined the European Tian Guo Marching Band, which remedied that regret from my youth. Today, the Tian Guo Marching Band has become a cultivation environment that I cherish deeply.

From the very first day I joined the band, various xinxing tests came one after another, exposing my attachments. At the beginning, fellow practitioners in the band were glad that I joined, recognizing my prior musical foundation. I often heard words of praise, which led me to become complacent and attached to my own skills, though in reality my playing was quite limited. In the early days of the Tian Guo Marching Band, many members had no musical background whatsoever. When I heard others playing wrong notes or missing the beat, I got annoyed, feeling a sense of contempt, and even secretly hoped certain members would leave the band. Sometimes I deliberately play loudly, trying to overpower the off-beat sounds from others. At that time, I did not truly understand the Fa and cultivation. Although I actively took part in the Tian Guo Marching Band and other truth-clarification projects, it was mostly driven by personal liking and aspiration.

Master said in the Fa Teaching Given at the 2011 New York Fa Conference: “…compassion is a trait of righteous gods. That is not to say that simply wishing to do some good counts as compassion. When someone is seized by a whim and acts on it, that doesn’t count as compassion. Rather, in that case it stems from the person’s likings. Or put more bluntly, it’s out of attachment.”

Though I have entered the ranks of Dafa disciples, doing the three things daily, I did so for selfish reasons. I felt cultivating Dafa could make me a noble person; being among fellow practitioners gave me a sense of belonging; joining the Tian Guo Marching Band satisfied my hobby. In fact, I was not cultivating at all, but merely pursuing things I considered beneficial.

Over time, through studying the Fa and being nurtured in the environment of Dafa disciples, I finally took the path of true cultivation. I came to understand the profound meaning of becoming a Dafa disciple and the sacred mission I ought to shoulder.

I gradually recognised the fundamental attachment in my cultivation: selfishness. Often, my attitude towards matters was self-centred. For example, when playing with the band, I often focused on my own playing, neglecting harmony with the whole. The negative thoughts that came when I heard others play wrongly were because, to some extent, it affected me.

In an article on Minghui, a fellow practitioner shared an observation: some practitioners display an unkind attitude when they see others' shortcomings. This mirrors the old forces' approach of persecuting Dafa disciples when they perceive a lack of diligence, reflecting the characteristics of the old universe. Reading this, I suddenly realised I too had this problem. My resentment towards others' mistakes exposed my own unkind heart. Whilst perceiving others as being wrong or not good enough, there exists a subconscious notion that I am correct and better than others. This very notion often obstructs me from seeing my own problems.

I have been a member of the Tian Guo Marching Band for more than 15 years, yet my playing has shown no significant improvement. Throughout this time, I have never met the band's requirement of regularly practicing my instrument. Other than objective reasons (such as work and family commitments), the fundamental cause is that I have not treated this with the criteria of a cultivator.

The level of musical skills among members of the Tian Guo Marching Band varies greatly. It is not possible to demand the same strict requirements as in an ordinary band. Some members still lack the basic understanding of following the rhythm and controlling volume. Compared to this, I felt my own level wasn't particularly poor within the band. Therefore, when life became busy, I would put my instrument completely aside, only picking it up for last-minute practice when there was an upcoming event or band test. Although I understood that instruments require consistent practice, seeing fellow practitioners with lower levels than mine pass the tests, I felt that my level was sufficient and didn't need to improve further.

 Master said in 《Zhuan Falun》lesson one : “Some even think that they are better than others, since they see themselves through the distorted lens of modern values, which has altered their sense of right and wrong.”

Even as an ordinary musician, the most basic requirement is to practice regularly and try to improve one's playing. Yet I had set myself the standard of merely being “better than some others”. I did not meet the requirement of an ordinary musician, and even less so of a practitioner.

This year, when I picked up my instrument again after a six-month break, I found it extremely difficult. I couldn't even play some relatively simple pieces without mistakes. Though I passed the band test, I felt deeply ashamed. I told myself this couldn't continue; I had to set new standards for myself. I tried practicing my instrument every day as much as possible, even if only for a few minutes. I placed my instrument in the living room instead of the attic as before, so I could pick it up and play whenever it was convenient. The results of consistent practice were evident; I quickly felt less strained when playing. When the band performed in Vienna, I was astonished by how much my playing had improved in such a short time. Though I was still far from the level I should reach, I decided to strive for better standards.

Master said in the Teachings at the Conference in Los Angeles (2006) : “When the band was playing, the energy they emitted was tremendous. Be it the energy emitted, the sounds you made, or the music and notes themselves, they all had the effect of affirming the Fa and sending out energy.”

Master's words made me realise: the real quality of the Tian Guo Marching Band is to offer people the opportunity to know Dafa and be saved. Its role in other dimensions is extraordinary. Musical performance is merely the superficial manifestation of this dimension. Ordinary human skills do not have the power of the Fa. Only by assimilating with the Dafa, letting go of self, and playing music with a pure heart, can I truly fulfil my role as a member of the Tian Guo Marching Band. I am profoundly grateful to Master for granting me this precious cultivation environment within the Tian Guo Marching Band and for this wonderful form of saving sentient beings through music.

Thank you, Master!

Thank you, fellow practitioners!